This section is just a place for me to ask questions.  Get things off my chest.  And just rant.  I don’t expect anyone to reply or for there to be any sort of solution.  But any comments are welcome.

Who Am I?

The age old question Who Am I?  I thought maybe I knew me but somewhere along the way I’ve lost the me in me.  If that makes sense.  Who knows when it happened maybe when I got married or after the first child. Doesn’t matter when it did all that matters is that it did.   If you ask me my favorite color I couldn’t answer.  I know what it used to be.  Ask me what I like to do.  I usually say sew or scrap book.  I really don’t enjoy doing those things it’s just something I do because I feel there is a need for it.  I used to love to ski, play tennis, sing, or hang out with my friends.  After kids those seem to go to the wayside.

So how do you reclaim the me in me?  I’ve read in parenting magazines that you are supposed to set aside some alone time.  Alone what?  When is that supposed to happen at 5:30 in the morning before my kids are awake and I’m a zombie, or maybe after the kids go to sleep and I’m exhausted.  Or do I count the brief half hour I get to run to the store without my kids while my husband takes a turn.

How is it that I have forgotten who I am but my husband keeps discovering who he is?  Since we have gotten married he has discovered that he likes to cook, hike, garden, and fish.  Which of course he always seems to find time for.

Even if I was able to find time for something, what would it be?  If I don’t know who I am how do I know what I would like to do with my alone time?  Also to do some things it cost money.  Where is that supposed to come from.  I know we don’t have a tree out back just waiting for me to unload all it’s gold.  We are still trying to pay off student loans.  We can’t afford a membership to a gym, club, or choir or something else I may or may not enjoy.  So for the moment I’m stuck trying to figure out where I went and how I should be found.